Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Happy Thanksgiving, Slaves!
Thanksgiving is upon us, and as such, I'm going to spend the day testing the limits of how many deviled eggs I can eat before the rest of my family realizes that there are deviled eggs and making jokes about farts and boners with my brother. It's going to be awesome, just like every other day of my life.
I hope that all of you have similarly amazing days, and avoid the D.U.I. (or, in Texas, D.W.I.) like you would avoid the Noid (if you were a pizza). Whoever reads this is awesome, and should rest assured that I won't be nearly coherent enough to post anything else until the day that America shows just how greedy and terrible it can be, more commonly referred to as Black Friday. Celebrate avoiding any and all major retailers that day with me, because I'm an angry loner and crave constant attention from anyone and everyone, including you.
Black Friday will, incidentally, be the debut of my newest segment, titled "Since You Didn't Ask Me." This inaugural segment will feature my sentiments about the new Scion-sponsored Magrudergrind EP.
Eat something! Out your cousin! And let Reginald Veljohnson be the harbinger of your holiday season!